Lightyears[14/06/10]
I realise I never really think of the present as for what they are. I know I should and I often say to others that they should but I know I don't. I say a lot of things to others that I clearly know will come back and bite me in the back. I know it sounds like I'm a hypocrit, I guess I am but I say them anyway to make myself realise. And most of the time I state this fact to them. Other times I just bid them off to cry alone in the dark, lol.
Anyway, to take another step out of de'Nile, I will say this. I am stuck in the past. Past happiness, past achievements, past memories. I am dead afraid of the future. I know what I want but I don't know how to get there. I want to plan but I'm afraid to. Because if I do...there's just too much fear of the unknown.
CRAP, I don't know where I got this from. Planning was great in high school. I got here in dental school by planning and by sticking to that plan. Maybe because I became so unhappy here that it pasted a negative sticker onto that type of action. "Avoid in future thinking processes"...slap it on that planning button.
How would you like to leave your mark on this earth? Tell me...whoever's reading. Because I KNOW everybody share at least this thought if not all the above.
Puppy Cloud[13/06/10]
6 comments:
Nice one.
This is one of the challenges I face too.
Sometimes we just don't know how to get there.
Sometimes we already know, but don't have the strength to take actions.
Anyway, this is mainly about the ongoing internal struggle we have to face for like every second of our life.
The only way to happiness and leaving that shadow we want is to play the right role in any situation e.g His servant, daughter, friend.
It's just the matter of "what" and "how" :)
Please correct me if there's anything wrong in my opinion. Thanks loads for sharing your thoughts :)
thanx 4 das comment wan
yeah...but i wanna know what is your "what" part. what do u hv in mind of what that mark would be. what do u think u should contribute in wile ur in the living?
Edd,
By saying "what", that refers to the best you can GIVE in playing any role. That too, is a constant struggle that needs sacrifices and changes.
That's what I want to contribute before I leave this world :) I'm not aiming for something too big, just grasping the roots of what makes our lives.
Hehe, sorry if I don't make any sense or if I don't get your question.
no, no...i get u.
Leave a mark on Earth? Hmmm...I'd say its better to think of what you can give/do today. It's the little contribution you do today that can leave a big mark on Earth.
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